Today we have a very special happening on the blog. I have been very excited as this has been in the works for a little while now 🙂 It is my very first guest post from an incredibly sweet woman, Mary. Mary is actually the one who inspired me to get back into blogging so I thought it was only right to have her be my first (of hopefully many) guest posters. Let’s all give her a big warm welcome and take it away Mary!!

Hi, friends! I am so excited Erica asked me to write this guest post! She is the absolute sweetest and I love reading her blog!

I have been a Christian since I was 7 years old. There was an invitation in Vacation Bible School to accept Jesus as your Savior and I did. Growing up in a Christian household and attending church since birth has allowed me to become immersed in the Word for my entire life. At the age of 13 I was baptized and recommitted my life to being a follower of God. I went to Sunday School, Wednesday night service and youth group every week. I attended camps, retreats, and conferences. I was in small groups, Bible studies and participated in local mission work. The Word of God was constantly being poured into me in every single stage of my life. However, despite my upbringing, I still managed to fail and to stray away from my beliefs. I fell in ways I never would have anticipated, spiritually, emotionally and physically. I compromised my values that were instilled in me since a young age and I became lost, distant, and far from God.

When I was 16 years old I decided that it was time for me to date. Yes, that’s right, I decided. My parents never really had rules (at least that I was aware of) about when I was or wasn’t allowed to start dating, and at this very wise and mature age I felt I was ready. I guess most of these feelings were the result of falling for “that boy who plays drums.” He was the guy every girl wanted. He looked at me in a way that my young, innocent and girlish ways couldn’t resist. I fell for him hard and fast. He treated me like a queen, spoiling me with presents and dates weekly. Blowing off his friends to spend time with me, in which I followed suit. Calling me at night and talking for hours after spending a whole day together. Telling me that he has fallen in love with me in which I responded that yes, I had fallen in love with him too. He wasn’t a Christian, but I was convinced that that wouldn’t affect me, that I would be a good influence on him and change him for the better. Ever heard of missionary dating? It was my mission to get him saved. To make him into the boy that I wanted him to be. However, it didn’t work. Instead, he turned me into the girl he wanted me to be. Throughout those two years I lost friends, fell far away from God and made him my number one priority. I chose everything over him, including my morals and beliefs. Consequently, I ended up giving him pieces of my heart that weren’t his to have and in the end was left broken, feeling inadequate, unsalvageable, and anything but loved.

Looking back, I still have mixed feelings about this relationship. I am a full believer in God working through every situation of my life for a reason and a purpose. I still don’t know, and am sure I never will, the reason that God placed this particular boy in my life. Maybe I did have an impact on him and wasn’t aware of it? Maybe God needed to break me in some of the most fragile ways in order for me to turn back to him. Maybe there was no other reason but to be able to look back on a time in my life when I was away from Him in order to recognize how lost I am without him. Despite all the bad, I can see many positive things that came out of this season of my life. Things that have made me who I am today. Lessons that I learned and took into my next relationships. Memories of my teenage years that will forever remain with me. Yet, I still regret the relationship. It lead me to fall, to abandon God, my faith and everything that my life had been so firmly built upon. Not only did I fail my Heavenly Father but I also failed my parents and my friends, leading to even more brokenness and hurt.

My failure and inadequacy didn’t end with this season. It’s still occurring each and every day. I will constantly fail promises that I make to myself, to others around me, to my Savior. I will never be without sin in my life and sometimes that is a hard concept to swallow. It is exhausting to fail over and over again. To try my best just to come up short. Yet I know that in all things, God is with me. There are seasons in our lives where we may fall away from God, abandon him and everything we have held onto, yet he is still faithful. Always with us, never leaving or forsaking us. I didn’t deserve his love for me during that time and I will forever be undeserving of his love. However, I will still praise his name. No matter what heartache and brokenness I may face in the future, his unconditional, unwavering and endless love will always prove to be enough.

Thanks so much Mary for taking the time out of your busy schedule to do this for me and my readers! Congrats to you and Jed again on your engagement!

Enjoy some pics from our weekend! Stay tuned tomorrow as I may or may not have my first guest poster!! I hope your weekend was great friends!

I’ve been a little MIA this week.  Definitely did not hit my 3-4 posts that I wanted too 😦  This has been a crazy week at work and home so I’m sorry!  I promise to come back next week stronger and less preoccupied-hopefully.  There will even be a {guest post} next week…my first one!!  How awesome?!  It feels great to spread these little wings of mine.  And my birthday is next week too… woot woot!!  So for now  I hope your week was a good one, and enjoy the upcoming weekend 🙂
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What does this Friday mean to me?

A rainy morning at the bus stop with Angel.

Pay day- cha ching!

A trip to Bounce-U with the boys tonight for their reward of being very well behaved this week!

Catching up on some much needed reading {hopefully}.

A coffee date this weekend with my closest gals!

A visit from my husband’s long time friend.

Church on Sunday.

Folding a mountain of laundry-BOO!

A much needed break from the office atmosphere.

A few days closer to our Baltimore trip next week.

Only 6 days till my birthday!! Eeek 27!!!

It’s time.
30 minutes is what I’m committing to each day.
In the morning, at night after the kids have gone to sleep, on my lunch break, or stuck in traffic.
Last night was my first night and it felt absolutely AMAZING!
30 minutes with Him and the Word.
I BELIEVE this is what I need right now.
Each day. Keep me on track won’t you?

Ayden is our middle son.  He’s just about 3 1/2 now and always has been and I’m sure always will be our peanut.  I’m writing this post because I want to remember this exact moment in time.
Ayden is growing and changing right before our eyes.
I feel like in the past 2 weeks Ayden has grown exponentially.
I have a tendancy to “baby” him.  Maybe it’s his size, maybe it’s because I nursed him for the entire first year of his life, maybe because he loves extra cuddles in my arms , or because I don’t want him to have the dreaded middle child syndrome 🙂 either way he has a very special spot in my heart.
Ayden was very small when he was born and also spent the first 18 hours in the NICU because I had gestational Diabetes when I was pregnant with him.  He was immediately taken from us when he was born so we didn’t find out his height & weight until a little after we had him.
I remember there was a nurse outside of our delivery room and all I heard her say was  “6lbs 4oz and 18 inches.”  I thought to myself….is that my baby?  I didn’t even know they came that tiny!
Babies usually wear a size up from however old they are.
For example if they are 3 months they usually are wearing 3-6 or 6-9 month clothing.
At 3 months Ayden was still in newborn clothing.  He’s always been a size behind his age (if not two sizes!)
These past few weeks Ayden has really seemed to sprout up out of nowhere.  His pants are shorter, his shirt sleeves a little higher up on his arms, and he is able to reach more things.  He’s also becoming more independent.  Angel-our oldest- was always very independent from about age 18 months and up, and he was potty trained by his 2nd birthday!
To say that Ayden has been our most dependent child thus far would be an understatement.
Over the past few weeks Ayden has successfully mastered using the bathroom ENTIRELY by himself  (being a mom to 3 small children this is a HUGE help).  He has mastered opening the bathroom door, turning on the light, pulling down his pants, using the bathroom, pulling his pants back up, washing his hands AND drying them, turning the light back off and he even remembers to shut the door so Aaron cannot get in there.
Ayden can also brush his teeth completely on his own (I of course always check to make sure he did a good job), dress himself ENTIRELY, put on his own jacket, shoes, and hat as well!
I am dumbfounded!  This feels likes its just happening so fast-in the blink of an eye!  It felt like it was a snowball effect, like once the reigns were loosened, he was set free and become his own little big guy.
This is very bittersweet.

Skin makes us want to yell at the car that just cut us off.
Spirit makes us want to stop, take a deep breath and realize maybe the other driver has their own stuff going on.
Skin makes us want to raise our voice when our child does something out of line.
Spirit makes us kneel down in front of our child and explain to them right from wrong.
Skin wants us to be overwhelmed by laundry, cooking, cleaning and trying to juggle our daily activities.
Spirit wants us to stop and look around at the chaos in our lives and be thankful that we have a life at all.
Skin wants us to envy our neighbors new car.
Spirit wants us to rejoice in our neighbors happiness.
Skin wants to us to say “it’s not fair” when something doesn’t go as we hoped or planned.
Spirit wants us to remember He is our driver on our path.
Skin wants us to cry “why me” when something bad happens in our lives.
Spirit wants us to know He has got us, that He always has a plan for us.
Skin wants us to be greedy.
Spirit wants us to have open hands.
Skin is so very easily tempted by the devil and all the materialistic items he can fill our voids with.
Spirit reminds us that our time here should not be filled by earthly objects as we cannot take them with us when we leave here.