Courage

I just finished watching The Help.
 I read the book a few months back but seeing the story unfold before my eyes rehashed all of the feelings I had when I read the book. 
Wow. Emotions and a big old box of Kleenex!
 The line that stuck out most to me was when Skeeters mom says
 “sometimes courage skips a generation.”
 This really hit home for me. 
 This blog post is about to get real-to start believing in myself I have to tell who I am
 and where I came from.
 My grandmother had a huge hand in raising me and she was a very courageous woman.
 I never remember her having a cold, taking a sick day, not even a Tylenol-ever
She never once complained.
 She raised 4 of her own girls, took in countless number of kids from the neighborhood when they needed it, and took me when I was just 3 weeks old. 
 She was never bitter.
 She was never hateful, always loving. 
 I don’t have one memory of her ever yelling at me-ever
 She was always there for me, always a constant in my life. 
 This woman showed me more courage than I ever knew possible. 
Now it’s up to me. 
 It’s up to me to stand up and be the courageous woman she knew I had the potential to be. 
 If I could live to be half the woman she was I would be grateful
 Every day is a new day to be courageous.
 I need to start believing in those nudges I feel, that little voice in the back of my mind telling me I can I am worth it, I need to start acting on that fire I can feel burning inside of my heart. 
Today I stop planning & talking, and start doing! 
Join me won’t you?
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Surrender

I’ve been thinking about this word for a while now.
Surrender
So much so that I even wrote down some thoughts about it with a pen on an actual piece of paper! 
Then today at work while listening to one of my favorite Pandora stations {Hillsong radio} a song came on that said
 “in a moment of glorious surrender, you are with me” 
I thought this is a sign! 
 I’m believing in and listening to His signs.  
Believe being the word that I chose for 2012.  
Surrender
Surrender to some may mean giving up, throwing in the towel, or being so fed up that you are just done!
To others (and me) it means giving up who you used to be and running toward the person you want to become.
It’s about letting go of everything in your past and starting fresh.
This is not easy. It is hard work!
But like so many other process’s it is worth it in the end.  
Surrender means handing it.all.over. to Him.
Surrender can be glorious!
Realizing we can’t do it all but He can.
Realizing we are not made to be ridden with stress, anxiety, panic.
He is there to carry all of that for us.
We have to submit.
We need to surrender to him and give it all to him.
He is there to comfort us. 
He is there to carry our burdens and make our everyday lives easier.
Sometimes when you’ve tried every other option the only one left is to surrender- and that is NOT a bad thing!
This doesn’t mean that you have give up.
This simply means that you are opening that door….or perhaps cracking that window and letting 
Him into your life. 
Letting him in to heal, to take care of, to console, to make better.
Surrendering is a great thing.
Have you surrendered?

Kisses from Katie

Raw.
Emotional.
Selfless.  To the core.
Relying completely on Him.
Living life with complete open hands. open heart. open mind.
Brave.
Determined.
Beautiful.
These are just a few of the words that come to mind after having just finished Kisses from Katie.
Emotionally and spiritually this is one of the hardest books I have read…ever.
There is a genuineness that Katie has toward others. An unmeasured amount of love she has to give to others.

Take one look, one glimpse at Katie’s blog and you will realize the sheer selflessness she has.
You too will feel the same sense of urgency to help an innocent child that she did.

The amount of love she shows to strangers, innocent children because she feels we are all God’s children.  
Every single one of us.
The child without clean clothes covered in dirt
The child left orphaned who hasn’t eaten in days
The child who’s house is a cardboard box he shares with his 6 siblings and elderly grandmother
The child who is infected with scabies, and is HIV positive
While we are all worried about what is happening on the newest episode of our favorite tv show, or what dress we are going to wear out Friday night there is suffering going on all around the world.
We can make a difference. 
We take for granted our everyday gifts of living in a first world country.
Electricity, clean and warm running water, knowing where our next meal is coming from, medical treatment, etc.
What if it was your 2 year old little girl who was aimlessly wandering around with a distended stomach because her insides are so consumed with worms and weighed just 10 pounds.
What if your 4 year old was walking around naked begging for money or food to feed his family?
What if you were the mother whose only resort was to give your child home made alcohol every night so they wouldn’t be reminded of the hunger pains while they slept in piles of maggots?
These are the everyday condition these children live with.
Instead we worry about earthly objects: tv, cell phones, clothes, hair, makeup, having a bigger house, gathering more and more materialistic items so that we have them to show off to whoever is watching. “we cling so tightly to what we have because we are afraid of what would happen if we didn’t have these things anymore.”
Did you notice that I called them earthly objects?
That’s because you can’t take your million dollar house with you when you’re gone.
You can’t take your brand new sports car, or Louie Vuitton Purse, or Milano Blaniks when you leave this place.
Not everyone lives this way-focused on material items like we do. We all need to realize this.
I’m guilty of this. 
 I need to realize this.  
I’ll be the first one to stand up and say it too.  
One of the most profound things Katie says in this book that really sticks out to me is….
“This world is not overpopulated.”  
If we all came together and made a genuine effort then there wouldn’t be so many starving, alone, disease infected children in this world.  
Don’t think that you have to help everybody at once because that can be an overwhelming thought. 
All you have to help is one person at a time.
That is making a difference.  
One person at a time.
Now, I am not saying sell your home, your car, all of your clothes, possessions, empty your bank account and move out on the street.  
But what I am saying is…
What if we all lived a simpler life…so others could have more?
Or what if instead of saving that extra $50 for a “rainy day” what if we gave it away to somebody who really really needed it? 
What if we put the money we paid for our cable bill towards sponsoring a child in a third world country?
Would you be able to go without that fancy new dress to donate money to a local charity?
Would you be willing to become a one car family in order to make sure an entire family of 6 children had enough money for food, clothes, school, and medical treatment for the rest of their lives?
Open hands. Open heart. Open minds.
What are you willing to do without to make a difference in the life of one person?

This Friday

What does this Friday mean to me?
Mom’s Night Out ministry at our church and a much need break from my kids {yay for youth group/free babysitting} while I enjoy worship and crafting with fellow momma’s
Payday- and NOT the candy bar 🙂
Jeans day in the office
The beginning of the weekend
Not seeing my husband until we wake up on Sunday 😦
Scary movies {Friday the 13th}…yeah right I’m such a chicken
Setting goals for the weekend such as: cleaning the bathrooms, doing laundry, organizing something, etc.
none of which ever get accomplished
Later bedtimes for the older boys & major snuggle sessions
Eagerly planning a craft for my little kiddies in Sunday School this week
A trip to Target for our oldest who has earned a new game with good behavior…I hope I didn’t just jinx that one
Cooking up some tasty crock pot recipe’s
What does this Friday mean to you?

Pic taken on my way home from work the other night!

A Good Day

Let me preface this post by saying that I’m not a fan of boasting and usually do not write things like this ( I am actually very uncomfortable talking about myself and my material possessions and feeling like I am boasting in any way) but yesterday was a good day and I know it was because of Him.  Because of that I thought I would share my good day with you!

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It started when I picked up the tab for the car behind me in the coffee house drive-thru thanks to Ashley.  The feeling I got after doing this was completely exhilarating and I can only hope that the person behind me (I have no idea who they were) passed along that kindness to another stranger.

I have had a heavy heart regarding a ministry I am involved with at our church-not even sure that I wanted to keep pursuing it- and after weeks of prayer He finally answered me yesterday with great, great news!

The night before I went to a cash for gold party of a co-workers and turned in some old jewelry that had been collecting dust and walked a way with a nice chunk of money-which is very.much.needed!  I was so thankful to my friend and co-worker for inviting me. I also ended up booking my own party too!

We’re switching over to a new database at work and yesterday I sat through 4 hours of offsite training- and it felt good to know everybody else was just as lost as I was 🙂

I got a haircut-at.the.salon.  Enough said!

I made my very first batch of my dad’s homemade meatball’s and cooked them all day today in the crock pot so we will have a yummy dinner when I get home from work tonight!  There’s a homey-ness (not a real word, I know I made it up!) feeling that comes over you when you are in the kitchen cooking recipes for your own family that your parents used to cook for you.

I have started reading Kisses from Katie and this book has been such an eye opener.  In two words: its phenomenal and moving.  Because of this book that I at times have struggled to get through because it is emotionally exhausting and physically could not see as a result of the tears welling up in my eyes I have felt so inspired to have less so others can have more, and hope to soon have a talk with my husband to move forward with some of my ideas.  I’ll keep you posted on that one!

With three kids, a full time job, and a husband who works the complete opposite shift as I do days like this are few and far between so I have to take them while I can get them!  Yesterday was a good day because of Him.

BELIEVE

A few months back while visiting our local library I stumbled up a Christian Author, Debbie Macomber. 
 The very first book I read that she wrote was One Simple Act.
Now I say the.very.first. because I have not been able to stop reading her books ever since that one!
She tells us that we need to act on those little nudges we all have from God.
You know the firemen you see raising money in the freezing winter while doing a coin drop-buy him a coffee.
The lady you see walking in the rain to the bus stop-offer to give her a ride.
The lady who is counting her pennies at the check out with the stressed out look in her eyes as though she is calculating every item being rung up at the grocery store-if you can, pay for her groceries.
You get the point!   
Debbie also explains in this book that she chooses a word a year to live that year of her life by.  
I thought this was such a great and simple idea that this is the first year I am doing it.
And I am going to really stick by it-feel free to hold me accountable! 
 My word for 2012 is:

BELIEVE

Believe in myself…try something new.
Believe in others…start trusting others (this is HUGE for me)
Believe that I can make a difference…just one person at a time
Believe in Him…spend more quality time with Him.
Believe in this world…that not everyone is out to hurt one another.  Give everyone a chance.
Believe that I have power…to do great, powerful, life changing things.
Believe that my kids are only 5,3, and 1…and will not march to the drum like army ants and obey me (and that’s okay).
Believe that I matter…to believe in myself more, to gain confidence.

So that friends is my word for the year…Believe.
Whats yours?
  

A Beautiful Offering

So there’s this uh-mazing blogger that I discovered a few months back and her name is Casey
 She holds some of the very same beautiful beliefs we have, and has two of the cutest kids!
Her and her husband have decided to hand it all over to Him, to put all of their trust in Him…
…and so far it has worked out!
He is good!
There have been hard times-but they have simply made her stronger and more thankful for what she already has.
We could all learn a lesson or two from this incredible woman.
Plus she has one of the most adorable senses of fashion-like EVER!
She’s someone I have started to look up to in this blogging community 🙂
A while back she mentioned this life changing book she read called A Beautiful Offering
  After hearing her talk about it more and more I decided I had to get my own copy and see for myself. 
 WOW!
 That’s all I can say.
 The amount of knowledge and thirst for Jesus this book left me with will forever be immeasurable
 The way Angela Thomas breaks down some of the most crucial passages in the bible and the way she tells us we need to start living our lives as a.beautiful.offering to Him is truly inspiring!
This book will leave you feeling refreshed!
It makes you feel like you can do well by Him,
and that he knows we are all trying our hardest! 
 It feels as though she is sitting right across from you at a table in a cafe drinking a chai latte and explaining life 🙂
There are no judgements.
This is no feeling of inadequacy.
We all have a clean slate.
She admits she hasn’t led the most Godly life and that He doesn’t expect you to either because if you read this post He knows we’re not perfect. 
 After reading this book I felt like I was able to breathe a high sigh of relief. 
 And take another deep breathe to start my beautiful offering to Him. 
 This will definitely be a once a year read and my newest go to birthday gift! 
 Thanks again Casey for bringing this wonderful book into my life!

Perfection

Ever since I can remember I have been a perfectionist. 
 An over achiever if you will. 
 I thought everything had to be the best, and I always had to be on point. 
 Boy was I wrong! 
 A few years ago when I decided I wanted to really start developing my Christianity I realized that living my life according to the way Jesus wants me to isn’t always easy. 
 In fact most days it’s a battle
 Sure some days are easier than others but some days I feel like I can’t reach perfection, and that is very frustrating! 
 It feels unattainable…and then it hit me. 
 That’s okay.
 As much as He wants us to live a perfect life because He is perfect He also knows that we are human and that we sin.
 Isn’t that great news?
 He realizes that while we can try our darn hardest day in and day out we will never reach perfection because we are not Him.
 Sure some days are easier and we feel better when we try use the heck out of our little hearts to live a pure and right Christian life but the good news is He will love you even when you fail. 
In fact he expects you to fail.
 Some days it can be exhausting to try to fulfill His every want and expectation to live perfectly.
 The good news is He knows we are not perfect.
 All He expects us to do is give our best effort and to try to make the right decisions.
 I’ve learned sometimes it’s more about the path you take when you don’t succeed rather than the path you do
Every failure brings us closer to Him because when we feel inadequate we bring those feelings to Him.
 When we feel like we are at the end of our rope and we don’t have anymore steam we go to Him.
 When we are consumed with fear or don’t know what decision to make we go to Him.
 And He is always there for us. 
He’s like the 24 hour mini mart down the street that always serves coffee.
 His light is always on, he’s always got a warm cup of coffee and his arms are always open and ready to catch us!
 Isn’t it great having a savior?

P.S. We had our first snow here in Jersey and the boys are super excited!!