Category Archives: lessons

On Fear and Fighting

Posted in faith, Family, inspiration, lessons, life, Uncategorized by

During one of our late night talks this week my husband reminded me of a time in our lives when we didn’t know what our future held. It’s funny how once we actually make it through life happenings we file them away in our “never remember or bring up this moment again” file….Rewind to 5 years ago when I left my job of close to 5 years to embark on a completely different//new//uncharted possible career. I was going from a late night bartending gig to a desk job. I was going from sharing a place of employment with my husband for the past 5 years to being completely on my own.  

Completely different routine. Completely different location. Completely different people. Completely different flow. Completely different pay scale.

We were scared. We were nervous. We were unsure. All of those earthly feelings nearly paralyzed me from taking the leap.
I remember not knowing what the future held. I was unsure that this was a good choice for us and our little family, but I was completely trustworthy of our God. I knew He held us. I could feel this was the right move for our family. I knew if I ever wanted a semi- normal (weekends and holidays off) routine this was my move and this was the time to make it.
The past few months and life-moments have left my faith shaky. And I don’t like it one bit. I’m in a place of in between. I know who God is, and I know who I serve, but I don’t always rest assured in that fact. I have a terrible tendency to want to fix everything on my own. I am a controller by nature. A first born gal who can do it all. A fixer. A leader. I want to plan things and ways according to me and my schedule. I want things to play out to serve and humble me. I want everything to fall into the place I want it to fall into. Anyone else? 
This all comes about because once again my husband and I find ourselves in a place of the unknown. We don’t have answers to questions we want answered. We don’t know what our next move is. We don’t know what the future holds for us. 

It’s certainly not easy and I have to make a conscience effort, but I am telling myself every.single.moment of every.single.day he’ll be there.

A constant necessary, tangible reminder. 

Erica hold onto Him.

Give it all over to Him.

Stay steadfast in your faith.

You are a daughter of Him and His kingdom.

Run to Him.

He is there for you. 

His love never fails.

It never gives up.
It is SO easy to let the fear win. It is so easy to give in. To give up. Well you know what world? This girl isn’t giving up//backing down //or giving in. This is just another battle. Another fight. A fight that I’m feeling fully capable of winning with a little help from Him. I’m a fighter. An overcomer. I’m ready to hold steady to my faith, plant my feet, and let the storm roll through. 

Don’t give into the fear.

Give into your faith and Jesus.

He’s got you. He’s got this. 

  

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My Current Season of Life

Posted in lessons, life by

I am in a season of needing to take care of myself. And that is okay. It doesn’t mean I’ve failed. It doesn’t mean I’m useless. It doesn’t mean I get an “F” in motherhood. It does mean that I am exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally. I need to reset. To recharge. To rest. I need to restore my body and make it whole. And when I do I will be able to come back stronger than before.

I’ve made a new goal for myself. Do one thing for myself each day. It can be something as small as treating myself to an iced coffee, or as big as making a life change and sticking to it. 

If you follow me on Facebook Mom in the Middle or on Instagram Mom_inthemiddle then you know I have recently taken up Yoga! This was a big step for me… In fact it was Huge! You can read about my first experience ever with Yoga here. To say it has been amazing would be an understatement.

 I realize that in these moments I take for me I need to be intentional. With Yoga I try to sign up ( in advance) for atleast 2, sometimes 3, classes per week. I need to be intentional about carving out and setting aside time for me. And I can’t feel guilty about it. If I don’t take care of me then I can take care of the rest of my people. I love my people and they deserve the best of me, not a tired, worn out, over worked grumpy version of me!  

Today, as a blogger, I had the opportunity to go get a massage- what a treat! That was intentional time that I took for me today and it was glorious! I picked up the phone, I cleared my schedule, arranged childcare, booked the appointment, and I showed up. All intentional. 

The other thing I’ve realized is the more often I take time for me the more I am okay with it. The more often I work on me the more comfortable I become with it. I’m not gonna lie…at first it’s weird and awkward and no matter how hard I tried I felt out of place. It wasn’t easy. I felt out of place without a child clinging to me, it felt unnatural without constantly having to do something for someone else-it felt wrong to put myself first so much so that  experiencing peace and calm felt unnatural. 

The past two weeks have been eye opening. I had allowed myself to get to such a dark place of self neglect that I literally had to claw and fight my way out. 

My journey isn’t over. I’m not sure it ever will be and I’m okay with that. For now I am taking time to work on me. 

   

  

  

A little dust on the bottle

Posted in blog, inspiration, lessons, life by
Ever heard that country song “A little dust on the bottle?” Well there’s a little dust on this blog and I’m going to try my darn hardest to get it all off! I’ve been following a lot of blogs lately and have been so inspired. I feel like I have a much better grasp on the blogging community thanks to these lovely ladies: Mary at Lily White, Casey over at The Wiegands, Ashley from Little Miss Momma, and Ashley from The Shine Project.

Over the past couple of weeks these girls (some fellow momma’s & some not) have taught me many life lessons. Lessons such as being yourself, not hiding who you truly are, not being afraid to show people your faults, handing over all of your worries and anxieties to the Lord, using what we have to help others-even when what we have may not seem like that much, and so much more! These ladies have truly been inspiring and I can only hope to achieve a tiny little piece of what they have through their amazing words in each of their blogs.

Who knows…maybe this will be the time that I actually find myself through this blog.